The Man Who Named His Dog Buhari And His Dog
Editor’s note: Last week Wednesday, the arrest of Joe Chinakwe, a 30-year-old trader who named his dog Buhari made major
headline after being which he was arrested by the police in Ogun state, and spent three days in police cell. In this piece, Reuben
Abati reminds Nigerians that we are in a democracy and that somebody in a responsible position just put an end to this joke. The
one absolutely unselfish friend that a man can have in this selfish world, the one that never deserts him and the one that never
proves ungrateful or treacherous is his dog – George Graham Vest (1870) Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Buhari dog The
man who named his dog Buhari Joe Fortemose Chinakwe, the man who named his dog after President Muhammadu Buhari is right
now probably regretting his decision to honour his dog with the name of a man he considers his hero. He has been accused of
trying to incite hate and breach the public peace. He has been arrested and re-arrested by the police and taken to a magistrate
court, which promptly remanded him in prison until he is able to meet the conditions of his bail. He has spent days in prison
custody unable to raise the N50, 000 that he has been asked to pay. His family members have only so far managed to raise N20,
000. Even if he succeeds in putting that sum together, his life is still in danger because aggrieved persons in his neighbourhood,
including a man who says he was trying to ridicule his father, have threatened to kill him, if he shows up. The police are not
investigating this threat, but they seem so excited about dealing with the poor trader called Joe, for having the effrontery to name
his dog, Buhari. Public opinion appears to be divided as to the nature and seriousness of Joseph Chinakwe’s alleged felony,
with some people arguing that it is definitely an act of provocation and incitement for him to label his dog, Buhari so boldly and to
parade the same dog in a neighbourhood where there are many residents of Northern extraction, whose feelings may be injured or
who may perceive that he is trying to make a political statement. Those who want him punished have therefore dismissed
Chinakwe’s protestation that he is an admirer of the President, or that he means well. His defenders insist that he is entitled to free
speech and there is nowhere in the statutes where a man can be punished on the basis of the perception that some people’s
feelings may be injured, and hence, be prompted to commit murder. The law is not structured that way. We are dealing, therefore,
with ethnic hate at the lunatic fringe. Nigerians have become so suspicious of one another, and inter-ethnic relationship is so
poisonous that even the littlest innocent gesture could result in mayhem. This is why many have been killed for allegedly
committing blasphemy or for insulting the religious sensibilities of some people. Remember the woman who was killed by her
students for allegedly desecrating the Quoran. Remember Gideon Akaluka. Remember the woman who was recently beheaded in
Abuja for daring to preach the Christian gospel. We are also dealing with disregard for human freedom, and Nigeria’s slip into a
tragic season of intolerance. Why shouldn’t Chinakwe call his dog whatever name catches his fancy? Well, may be he should have
chosen an Igbo name? But if we want national unity, why shouldn’t he take a name he admires from another part of the country?
Ali Baba, the ace comedian, like many others, has come out strongly in defence of Chinakwe saying he actually has a dog in his
house named OBJ, and that is quite direct because only one man bears that sobriquet in this country, and neither OBJ nor his
kinsmen have asked Atuyota to leave Yorubaland. One of the most famous pictures online is that of a goat named Goodluck
Jonathan, with the name written on both flanks of it. President Jonathan’s wife was also once (July 2013) referred to as
“shepopotamus” by Nobel Laureate Wole Soyinka, and before our very eyes, President Olusegun Obasanjo, donated, to a
conservation sanctuary, a chimpanzee, which he named Patience to make a point obviously. The parody at the time was
unmistakable. We all drew humour from all of that. What we seem to be dealing with right now, however, is the absurd deification of
a name on ethnic and partisan grounds. It is curious that the Nigeria Police is devoting to the trial of Chinakwe, a feverish amount
of energy that we have not witnessed with regard to more statutorily relevant offences. This hullaballoo over the giving of a dog a
name that has led to its hanging and the likely punishment of its owner is one distraction too many. We are above all else, dealing
with a storm in a tea cup, occasioned by a culture shock, and our underdeveloped understanding of the relationship between man
and animals. Why he chose the name Buhari Chinakwe says he chose the name Buhari out of admiration. And he may well be right,
and he would have been right, and there would have been no problem if he was living in Europe or North America. But he lives in a
country where animals have no rights and no recognition other than as victims of human predators, and a dog in our culture is to
be treated as an instrument or as meat for the soup pot. Elsewhere, a dog has earned its reputation in mythology and actuality, as a
man’s best friend. The root of this is that a dog is considered the most beloved, the most loyal and the most dependable of all
animals. People use dogs to guard their homes, to keep away intruders, even to play with children and as companions in the home.
There are many stories and legends about the loyalty of dogs. Hawkeye is the name of a famous dog who lay next to the casket of
its owner who died in active service as a U.S. Navy SEAL. There is a film, “Hachi, a dog’s tale,” starring Richard Gere, about
Hachiko, a dog who greeted his owner at the train station everyday and after the owner died, the dog went to the same station for
nine years. Recently, I posted on instagram the picture of a dog in Santa Catarina, Brazil, Negao the dog, whose owner died eight
months earlier and the dog remained outside the hospital awaiting his owner’s return. In the United States, a police dog has been
given a state burial, draped with national colours in appreciation of its loyal and meritorious service to the nation. Many centuries
ago, Homer wrote in Odyssey, about a loyal dog, Argos who waited for Odysseus until he returned. And this is why in
other parts of the world, when people name their dogs after celebrities, they are actually paying compliments and showing respect.
World figures like Elvis Presley, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Louis Vuitton, Mandela, Clinton, J. F. Kennedy and others have had their names
given to either cats or dogs, and it is no big deal. Admirers transpose their feelings from man to animal. Joseph Chinakwe may
actually be saying that President Buhari is a loyal, trustworthy, supportive, dependable and companionable Guardian of the
Nigerian estate. It would have been a different thing perhaps if he had given that name to a tortoise, a rat, cat, a fox, or a
chimpanzee. But in a country where every animal is considered a prey or a lower, spiteful creature, using the metaphor of a dog
could be risky as the Chinakwe case has shown. In Nigeria, we treat animals badly, and we don’t consider anyone a friend, man or
animal. We are vengeful, mean and suspicious. We are so scared we are even afraid of domestic and domesticated animals. In
other societies, animals are treated with greater respect and in the United States, for example, the life of a dog is far superior to that
of a human being in Nigeria. I have written about this twice: In “A Dog’s Life” (1996), I reflected on the life of a dog owned by
Stanley Meisler (God bless his soul) and his wife, Elizabeth Fox, my hosts during my journalism programme at the University of
Maryland, College Park, United States (1996 -97). I was shocked that the dog had a room of its own, a proper room, not a kernel, and
whenever that dog fell ill, we took him to a dog hospital and Stanley bought drugs. I saw that dog living the life of a king, better
catered for than many Africans. I wrote another piece titled “A Hotel for Dogs” (July 23, 2006) about a five-star hotel in Bethesda,
Washington, which attends to dogs as customers, and where dogs enjoy a life of luxury. Established in 2003, by PetSmart Inc., by
2006, there were 32 hotels of its type in the United States and the then spokesman of the group, Bruce Richardson, had boasted
that by 2010, the plan was to have 240 such hotels across the United States. We are talking luxury, 23 USD per night, 33USD for a
dog suite, as at that time, all pre-tax, plus provisions for pooch ice cream. In general, Americans spend about $40 billion a year on
household pets. I guess that is more than Nigeria’s annual budget even by today’s relative standards. And so, what are we talking
about? An American dog is a big man in Nigeria by all standards. But because we eat dogs and treat all animals badly in this
country, in fact we have no regard for human beings (consider the hundreds that get killed, raped, kidnapped daily and nobody
cares), we are bound to be incensed that anyone would name a dog after a deified political figure. Joe Chinakwe’s sins should be
forgiven, albeit there is no morality in law, but the Nigerian judiciary should not expose itself to further ridicule by lending the
weight of the law to such partisan trash that makes no sense. There are far more important issues requiring serious attention in this
country today. That is perfectly within their rights to do. And should they find themselves in any other difficult situation, they have
my full permission to rename the dog, Reuben Abati. But should you, dear reader consider this a bad name you wish to hang, you
also have my full support, partnership and friendship to offer your own name. If that will put an end to this circus over the name of a
dog, and set Joseph Chinakwe free, and also remind us that we are in a democracy, please, help and so be it. By the way, I hear
Chinakwe and his sympathisers finally managed, after a fund-raising appeal, to raise a sum of N90, 000 to perfect his bail bond and
that he is now out of detention. Would somebody in a responsible position just put an end to this joke and let us focus on serious
issues? This opinion first appeared in Guardian The views expressed in this article are the author’s own and do not necessarily
represent the editorial policy of Naij.com. Your own opinion articles are welcome at samuel.adesanya1love@gmail.com — drop an
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